June 26, 2016 alanscag What If? What If? APS – Written 12/12/12 This poem of gratitude is dedicated to the one who saved my life on December 12th, 1977… Sandra Kay Sawyer Wood May I am forever…Eternally grateful! What if… She never called? What if? She never questioned? What if? She never realized? He was not going to get out of that red recliner… He was not going to listen to her… He was not going to check on me. And she must have sensed that… As she drove 15 miles in 11 minutes, Running every stop light in between… Just knowing, in her gut, that he was not going to check. Not on me. So she had to… she drove faster than was wise because she knew… Something wasn’t right… with me. And she walked in, saw him there, in that chair—he had never moved. She ran past him and found me… already gone… but she wasn’t ready to let me go. I only know what I have been told…but I know that she saved my life because… she knew. She knew what I would have missed… I would have missed… Graduation when I “tripped” in front of the Principal’s feet—and got a standing ovation! I would have missed… Starting law school on my 21st birthday! I would have missed… The birth of my twin daughters and going from pro-choice to pro-life in that instant! I would have missed… The birth of my son who would someday have a son…and they would carry on our name. I would have missed… Travelling around America and Europe on IBM’s dime! I would have missed… Paris—my heart still remembers seeing the Eiffel Tower and not being able to move-Awestruck! I would have missed… Finding the love of my life… in the midst of a sea of lifelong friendship—there she was, all the time! I would have missed… Graduations, Weddings, Births, even some deaths. I would have missed it all! She knew…I just couldn’t miss any of it! I had to see… My son hold his son for the first time. I had to see… My daughter graduate college on a May Saturday morning, on a green lawn with white wooden chairs. I had to see… My daughter get married on a beautiful July afternoon that even the rain had to stop and watch! I had to see… The Grand Canyon; Niagara Falls; Las Vegas strip while driving on a Friday night with my family. I had to see… My son say yes to his bride on a blue moon New Year’s Eve while I officiated the ceremony. She had to have known. She must have realized what I would have missed. What if? What if she never called, never drove, never thought… he wouldn’t get up… to check on me? Will never know why, never grasp what moved her that night, but… I’m just so glad it did! I owe her all of this… Because… She knew… I just couldn’t miss a minute of it!